Friday, September 5, 2008

School Reveille

No wonder the god-damn tuition is so expensive!

When you think about it, this is the perfect way to keep control of the kids. Am I ever glad I grew up in a time when kids could go outside unsupervised and play.

Hey, students, do you feel free with every second of your time planned and accounted for?

Almost feels like a PRISON, huh?

"At colleges, a new freshman rush; Orientations are spiced up to build spirit, ease transition" by Peter Schworm, Globe Staff | September 5, 2008

Now, first-year students arrive on campus to a new level of fanfare, greeted with a welter of events designed to build school spirit and ease the often bumpy transition to college life. While the traditional information and advising sessions remain, they are increasingly taking a back seat to a frenetic schedule of social outings, from harbor cruises to yoga classes and comedy shows.

The steady expansion of back-to-school events reflects a broader campaign among colleges to offer students top-flight amenities, including plush dorms and state-of-the-art athletic facilities. The effort seeks to give schools a competitive advantage and make students happier with their experience, with the potential of more generous donations after graduation.

Ooooooooohhhhh! It is ALL ABOUT the $$$$, huh? What a SHOCK!!!!

Colleges and students alike have spurred the move to elaborate, event-driven orientations. Schools say they believe the intensely scripted approach, which sometimes gives students several simultaneous activities to choose from, makes a strong first impression, dazzling new arrivals and their parents with a whirlwind of meet-and-greets.

Many of these students have had busy schedules in their childhood and are accustomed to dashing from one event to the next. They arrive on campus anticipating a dramatic and memorable start to their college years.

Translation: We have brainwashed the kids to accept military-style and prison-style regimentation.


"From soccer to swimming lessons to camps, most students have had very structured experiences," said Andrew Shepardson, dean of student affairs at Bentley College, whose "First Week" booklet is 36 pages long. "They expect that to continue."

You ready for a DRAFT, kids?