""President" McCain Assassinated in Los Angeles"
"June 20, 2009 by Binyamin Nerdfinkel
Los Angeles-President McCain was assassinated today in Los Angeles, while giving a speech to the "Friends of Israel" committee at a local synagogue. The president was rushed to Sinai Memorial Hospital, but by all accounts, is presumed to be dead.
The gunman was cornered at a local mosque, where a shootout ensued, ending with the death of the suspect. Police say that the Secret Service has found the sniper rifle, an Iranian made Steyr.
As this article was going to print, Vice-President Joe Lieberman was being sworn in as president and is said to be calling in the Joint Chiefs of Staff to choose what military response there will be to this heinous crime.
The White House issued a short press release, saying that "President Lieberman is aghast at this unprovoked act of terror, committed by elements of the Iranian Revolutionary Guard. President Lieberman says Americans will take their grief and turn it into a mighty sword, to smite the enemies of this republic."
The White House also stated that due to certain "terrorist" elements lurking on the web, the Internet will be shutdown, but only long enough for the Department of Homeland Security to install the protective "OVERLORD" software so that the Internet will cease to be breeding grounds for terror and insurrection.
Satire? Not if John McCain receives the Republican nomination for president and is so desperate or so stupid as to have Joe LIeberman as his vice-presidential candidate.
For if the McCain-Lieberman ticket does win in November, within the year, John McCain will die a strange and sudden death, propelling Lieberman into the presidency.
It wouldn't take much. All the Israeli intelligence service MOSSAD has to do is to fine tune their Kennedy assassination models.
Only this time, instead of a "Palestinian" killing the president, it will be an "Iranian" who pulls the trigger, putting Joe boy Lieberman in charge of the nation's nuclear arsenal.
And away we go to WW III. All for the benefit of our bestest friend and buddy in the ME, Israel.
Norman Podhoretz wets his "Depends" just thinking about this scenario.
Alan Dershowitz likes to curl up in bed, thinking long and hard about this scenario while using his hands to stroke his "fantasies" of manipulating the US into bombing Iran.
Laying next to Alan is Daniel Pipes, wearing a stain sodden blue dress he borrowed from Monica Lewinsky.
Dougie Feith is on hand, well, to lend a hand to any that might be experiencing "erectile dysfunction."
And hiding in a "secure, but undisclosed" closet, is none other than "Big Dick" Cheney.
But the "Dick" is too busy counting his well earned shekels to join in this macabre "Dances with the Fist" celebration.
And Michael Ledeen supplys all with a generous helping of "yellowcake".
As long as they let Michael lick the "icing" off the walls."
